SO YER trav-lin- for yer pleasure while yer writin- for the press?
An- yer huntin- arter -copy�?-well, I-ve heer-d o- that. I guess
You are gorn ter write a story that is gorn ter be yer best,
-Bout the -blunders an- advenchers ov a new chum in the west?�
An- you would be very thankful an- acknowledge any hint?
Well, I karn-t say as I hankers fur ter see my name in print;
But I know a little story an- I-ll tell it out ov hand
If yer-ll put it down in writin- that the swells kin understand-
(It-s a story ov a new chum, and-a story ov the land.)


He had lately kum from Ingland-you cud tell it by -s cap-
Fur -kerlonial exper-ence� (an- he got it, too, poor chap).
-Twas in town he met the squatter, an- he asked, as if in fun,
-If the boss -ud want a flunkey or a coachy on the run?�
Well, it riz the boss-s dander, an- he jumps clean orf -is -oss-
-Now, me fresh, sweet-scented beauty, watyer giv-nus?� sez the boss;
-I hev met yer kidney often, an- yer mighty fresh an- free,
But yer needn-t think yer gorn ter come a-lardin- over me!�


But the new chum sed that -onest he was lookin- for a job,
An- in spite of his appearance he had blued -is bottom bob.
An- as beggars karn-t be choosers same as people wot are rich,
Said he-d go as stoo-rd or gard-ner, but he warn-t partickler which.
Well, the joker seemed in earnest, so the boss began ter cool,
An- he only blanked the new chum for a thund-rin- jumpt-up fool.
Then he sed, -Well, there-s the fencin-, if yer-ll tramp it up from Perth,
The boys -ll find yer su-thin p-r-aps, an- giv- yer wat yer worth.�


Ov course the squatter never thort ter see -im any more,
But he wa-n-t the kind ov new chum that the squatter tuk -im for;
No, he wa-n-t the kind er cockeroach that on-y kums ter shirk,
That wants ter git the sugar, but is fri-tened ov the work;
For he sold -is watch -n- jool-ry, -n- lardi-dardy suits,
Stuck a swag upon his shoulder, -n- -is feet in blucher boots;
An- I dunno how he did it, he was anythin- but strong,
But he -umped his bluey ninety mile an- kum to Bunglelong.

He earnt -is pound and tucker borin- holes an- runnin- wire,
An- he-d work from dawn to sunset, an- he never seemed to tire;
But he must have suffered orful from the tucker an- the heat,
An- the everlastin- trampin- made -im tender in the feet,
An- he must hev thort ov England w-en the everlastin- flies
Ware a-worrit, worrit, worrit, an- a-knawin- at -is eyes;
An- he used to swear like thunder w-en the yaller sergeant ants
Took a mornin- stroll, promiscus, on the inside ov -is pants.

He uster make -is damper six or seven inches thick-
It was doughey on the inside an- the shell was like a brick,
An- while the damper made -im dream ov days ov long ago,
The little boodie rats -ud kum an- nibble out the dough.
He biled -is taters soggy, an- -is junk was biled to rags
(The little boodie rats -ud kum an- chew -s tucker bags),
But he took -is troubles cheerful, an- he fixed -em like a pome,
An- writ -em in his darey to amuse the folks at home.

At first he flashed a coller an- was keerful with -is hat,
An- he-d black -is boots ov Sundays, but he soon grew out of that;
An- he lernt ter bake -is damper, an- he leant to bile -is junk
An- sleep without a-getting up all night ter shake -is bunk.
He soon got out ov takin- -shorter cuts� across the flats,
An- he learnt to fling ole bottles to the sorror of the rats,
An- learnt to sling kerlonial and like the bushman-s way,
An- it did us good to see -im smoke -is -nigger� in a clay.

He would sing an- play -is fiddle when we gathered round the blaze,
Till ole Frenchy got excited while he-d play the Mascylays;
An- Bill -ud take -is hat off while he-d spout the Light Brigade,
An- Scotchy got oneasy when the -Bony -Ills� was played.
So we got ter like the new chum for we-d met with many wuss,
An- we made it easy for -im an- he seemed to take to us:
The toilin- an- the trampin- was a-cookin- -im we found,
So we made -im cook an- stoo-rd just ter keep the chap around.

Well, the months went bakin- broilin- on until Christmas nex-,
When we tramped it down to Perth to spend our -ollyday (and cheques);
But Possum sed he-d save -is tin an- stay and mind the camp,
So we left -im in possession an- we started on our tramp;
(We useter call -im Possum, but for short we called -im Poss,
For -is eyes was black an- twinklin- and a little chap he was),
We never would have left -im if we-d know-d (but that-s the ru,
Comin- back we found -im dyin- in -is gunyah in the scrub.

We fixed -im up an- nursed -im; but we seen without a doubt
That consumption was the matter, an- the chap was peggin- out;
But the lion heart inside -im was as strong an- stout as six,
An- while he-d smile an- thank us he would joke about -is fix;
An- he said -twas very jolly to be dry-nursed in a tent,
An- he reckoned that the Christmas was the best he-d ever spent;
He would talk of -ome and Inglan- when -is head began ter swim,
But he never blamed the country that had been so -ard on him.

He would say, -I like the country; if a feller-s blind er halt,
Or if he-s got konsumption, why it ain-t the country-s fault.
The tea that-s boil-d in billies is far sweeter stuff, I know,
Than the cursed drink w-at blasted all my chances long ago.
I would hev cum out sooner if it was my destiny,
An- I daresay that the country would have made a man ov me.
But w-at-s the good ov energy, an- wat-s the good er -push-
W-en a feller-s sick an- dyin- in a gunyah in the bush.�

But he tole me all about it as I sat beside -is bunk-
How he-d spent -is tin in Melbourne an- was allers gettin- drunk;
How he thort he-d take it easy while he had a little gold,
And, before he turned the new leaf, how he scribbled on the old;
An- among a lot ov nonsense w-en -is mind began to drift,
He told me that the new leaf was a heavy leaf to lift.
But w-ats the good er writin- this, it-s nothin- very new,
The land will see enough ov it an- suffer for it, too.
An- he said w-en he was dying, (when his lung was spit away)
An- we all was standin- round -im in the gunyah where he lay,
An- he said, -I-ve watched the sunset-when the wind began to -woosh-,
Like a layer ov coals a-glowin--on the dark bed ov the bush;
An- I felt my fingers slippin--slippin--slowly-from the ropes,
Wen the West was cold-like ashes-like the ashes of my hopes;
An--I-- Sit beside me-Peter-let me -old-a-bushman-s hand,
For I-m-gorn to--ump-my bluey-through the gates ov-Newchumland.�